Monday, 31 May 2010

Diaries.

I have been awfully sloppy with keeping my diary the past couple of years.
I've either been too depressed, too inactive, or too busy to write about anything.
I know, the extremes.
I thought about starting to keep it regularly again a few weeks ago.
So today I found some time left over, and that's what I did.
I wrote. 16 pages of small writing, my hand genuinely hurts.
I'm glad I started though. Plan on keeping it up.
That's mainly what this is for.
Self motivation.
Feel free to share words of encouragement xD

xxx
The Gypsy

Snapped joints, and On Movies.

Apparently, you can "break" joints.
Or to be more accurate, they can snap.
And make the weirdest crunching noise whenever you move..
Though it doesn't hurt as much as it sounds (or maybe I really am getting used to pain so much I don't really wince anymore?), it's only hell trying to walk up or down stairs.
Happy happy joy joy.

I saw three movies this month. Or to be more accurate, in the last ten days.
The most awesome of the three was definitely Prince of Persia: The Sands Of Time. Maybe because of the game -anyone saying the movie wasn't influenced by the game is a big fat liar-, and it's partly the actors too. Though a bit predictable, it had tres funny moments. And it was very pretty; effects and scenes alike.
Robin Hood was good. Powerful. Fighting for what they believed in, no matter what. "Rise, and rise again, till lambs become lions." It's one of those quotes I'll have a hard time forgetting. Not that I'm trying, mind.

Centurion is the one I'm torn about. It had some good 300-like blood spatter, but overall the scenes were very much alike throughout the movie, and it had this grey-ish shade to it. Maybe it was because not all the actors were very convincing, though there were some very good ones.

Now I'm probably stuck at home for a week.
Which is okay. Maybe I should start dowloading some of the I-need-to-see movies and watch those. Or I could always start finishing reading the books I borrowed from friends and family.
Heh. Yeah. Still a procrastinator. Oh well.

xxx
The Gypsy.

Sunday, 30 May 2010

Sunny with a chance of hailstorms.

I'm wondering what's wrong with the weather.
A serious question, I'm afraid.

This morning, it was pouring rain. Just an hour ago it was frightfully sunny, followed by an incredibly noisy hailstorm. Now it's sunny again, but it'll probably rain again before tonight.
This in the same country where a week ago people lay crisping in the sun, totally red and burnt, happy and enjoying it because of days like today.

Also, I needed to share this with you:
From the talented Valerius Student Orchestra I got a chance to play with twice,
another concert: Bohemian Tales.
This time, I listened, took pictures and videos and completely absorbed/enjoyed the show.






Oh, and I got rammed by a car.
Bruised knees. They kinda really hurt.

xxx
The Gypsy.

Wednesday, 26 May 2010

'Lo and Behold

On mist, sand, cats, and nature.

































































xxx
The Gypsy

Wednesday, 19 May 2010

Philosophize.

Who thought up the word "decision"?
They need to be shot.
The word itself is terrifying, let alone trying to make one.
Why did that ever have to be so hard?

Also, trying to read Sophie's World.
A great guide to basic philosophy, but as a novel, not so great.
Did I post that here already?
I know I've already said it, somewhere.

Haven't been getting much sleep.
Might have a bit of an addled brain.

xxx
The Gypsy

Sunday, 16 May 2010

On kids.

At some point last week we spent some time youtubing kids.
Or rather, youtubing things we could laugh at/about.
I know, it sounds mean. Well, it kind of is. But still. So much fun.
The best ones were dutch, though.
So there's no point in me posting those here.
Enjoy.





xxx
The Gypsy

Thursday, 13 May 2010

My 'Latest' Paintings.

I wouldn't say /all/ of these are recent.
They aren't.
But I haven't shared them. Yet.
Three of them were presents.
It's really odd feeling, and yet fun to gift. It's so much more.. I don't know. Personal?
Enjoy ;D





xxx
The Gypsy

Wednesday, 12 May 2010

Backflash.

Two years ago, these few days after my birthday were my own personal hell.
Everything that could go wrong, went wrong.
I've never been in a depression more horrible than that, and I hope I never will, either.

I still miss Pluisje a lot. She was more than just my pet.
I don't think any other animal can/will replace her. Ever.
And that's okay. I can remember her with a smile, now, though it still hurts.

I miss other things that I'll also never get back.
Here's to hoping maybe some day (soon) I'll get something that'll make things at least as good as they were back then..

No. Not emo. Nor melancholic ;D **
Just a bit nostalgic. Maybe.

xxx
The Gypsy

** Reference to an inside joke.
With emphasis on joke.

Big mouth.

When it happened once, I sort of felt lied to.
When it happened the second, I started feeling betrayed.
When it happened the third time, I started wondering: Should I be worried?

People I know who have been telling me they will "NEVER EVER do this, that and the other", usually wind up doing exactly that. It is not even like they're forced to or anything. They just subtly start changing their minds.
I'm talking about big things here, by the way. Commitment, marriage, children, money and work, or anything even remotely linked to that.
"I'll never marry an Egyptian."
"I'll either marry my way, or no way."
"I wouldn't like a guy just cause he has money."
"I wouldn't ever take a job like that, not if they offered me millions."
Tsk. Yeah right.

It's not exactly what I say I'll never do. But I started to get worried.
Three times I've been disappointed by others. They're happy, or pretending to be.
I shouldn't be complaining at all. I should just shut it and be happy for them.
But what if /I/ suddenly change my mind?
I mean.. I'm against some things for a reason, aren't I? Principles? Or general dislikes? Beliefs? Anything? I shiver at the mere thought of backing down on anything, but the problem is, with some things, it's already happening. I catch myself thinking "Maybe it wouldn't be that bad."

God. Spare me.

xxx
The Gypsy.

Monday, 10 May 2010

22 Resolutions

People usually make a list of resolutions and things on New Year's Eve, start them cheerfully on the first day of the year, and usually let it die again within three weeks afterwards.

Though I make resolutions all year through which I usually kill within three weeks, I'm going to try and give it more effort than usual to actually pull this birthday-resolution-list through. So that it'll maybe last long enough to turn into a habit, and from habit into a life style.

Positivity; That's the keyword for all of them. Or is it Optimism?
Either way, both sound nice. xD

xxx
The Gypsy

Sunday, 9 May 2010

Bit Morbid.

I don't know how to put this and not sound macabre.
But I've been pondering about this for a few minutes, and I can't shake it.

22 hours from now, it will have been exactly 22 years since I almost died, and killed mum along with me by tearing that placenta, and having her bleeding all over the place.
It's odd to think of that near death experience, remembering nothing of it myself.

Every year around this time I'll get told the same horror stories.
It was a matter of minutes between life and death. For the both of us. Literally.
Yet it wasn't so bad that mum got so traumatised she never had children after me.
For my siblings, that's very lucky. Maybe for me, too. A bit. I'd've been spoiled, being a one-sy.

Doctors warned my parents about a possibly affected intelligence and immunity.
"Luckily", they were only correct with the latter.

To end it on a cheerful tone, it's mother's day, officially. (Again. We already celebrated the Egyptian one on the 21st of March)
So here's a genuine: I love you, mum. To no end.

xxx
The Gypsy.

Saturday, 8 May 2010

Smiling is infectious

Smiling is infectious

You catch it like the flu,

When someone smiled at me today

I started smiling too!

I walked around the corner

And someone saw me grin,

When he smiled I realised

I had passed it on to him.

I thought about the smile,

And then realised its worth

A single smile like mine

Could travel round the earth!

So if you feel a smile begin

Don't leave it undetected,

Lets start an epidemic quick,

And get the world infected.

xxx

The Gypsy

Wednesday, 5 May 2010

Remembrances and Liberty~

How many times do I have to say this: Narrowmindedness and stereotyping annoys me. Very much so.

If in Holland they hold a Remembrance of the Dead (Dodenherdenking) annually on the 4th of May (To commemorate all civilians and members of the armed forces of the Netherlands who have died in wars or peacekeeping missions since the outbreak of WWII), I do NOT want to hear "Oh, they're all jews," in a disgusted tone, when on that day shops are closed or people are on holiday.

Hitler didn't only kill jews. He killed everybody who didn't meet up to his "standards".
That includes (but is not restricted to) jews. Gypsies, the mentally incapable, he would've killed muslims if there were any within reach, and the list goes on. Nothing was good enough.
Hitler liked blondes. Even when he wasn't one himself. He liked blue eyes, even if his were dark.
Hitler thought what he was doing was for the best. For the interest of Germany and it's people.
That just makes him a deluded, rather sad figure.

And I'll bet the guy had fetishes that'd make your toes curl. Just sayin'.

On a happier note: the 5th of May is Liberation Day (Bevrijdingsdag) in Holland, to mark the end of the Nazi occupation. Yay to freedom.

xxx
The Gypsy.

Monday, 3 May 2010

Month Of May.

May.
Full of birthdays. (My own included)
Full of gifting. (And being gifted)

My weekend, though full enough of cramps, pains and nauseousness, was the longest and best I've had in ages.
I met (at least) 16 new people, most of whom were spiffingly awesome.
Also saw plenty of familiar (loved) faces I hadn't seen a while.
I also experienced being third, fifth and even seventh wheel. Though that wasn't necessarily negative. Plenty of distractions either way. (And analyzing people ^_^)

30th of April is a national holiday: Koninginnedag (Or Queen's Day - the old/deceased queen's birthday-).
A lot of people in the streets dressed in the Dutch Royal colour: Orange.
Unfortunately (the night before), also a lot of drunk and/or drugged people, a lot of harrassment, a lot of litter and noise. So we scurried to the safety of the nearest home, and watched a movie.
The day itself was good, strolling in the sun, meeting friends of Judith and Ricardo, and visiting a fun fair. Shooting games and Bumper Cars never get old.

And then May started.
The 2nd of May already hitting three birthdays in one go: Ricardo's, Ralf's and Myriam's (the last being my eldest dutch cousin.)
Ricardo celebrated it on Saturday. Lots of new faces, plenty of sun, apple pie and pancakes. Yum.
The day ended in a comfortable drowsiness, watching a french comedy (o.o;; I know, right?)
Ralf's party was on Sunday. More new faces. Though I think I was pretty stoned with painkillers, (enough to get lost in that little village of theirs from the busstop to Ralf's place, in the pouring rain) I pulled off socializing reasonably well. And more pie. Hurray.

The 5th is Rick's birthday.
The 7th is Wenjun's.
The 10th I share with a relative, and two Egyptian friends: Heba and Jasmine.
The 13th is Nina's, the daughter of my younger uncle.
I also think Amgad's birthday is somewhere in there. And Judy's.
*frowns*
And that's just the first two weeks of the month. xD

xxx
The Gypsy

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